Red
by ANIMELOVEDOLL
Summary: I haven't posted anything for four years. Just something I've been messing around with. NOT MY BEST STUFF BEWARE. Rated M. EdxRoy. If some people like it I may upload more to it and maybe other stories.
1. Chapter 1

Blood?

Impossible... he had trained that same move a million times. He knew it like the back of his hand. There was no way anyone could get past this. Everything was covered, there was no opening for failure.

So why... was there blood?

He touched his side timidly and lifted his hand to look. Fighting his eyes to stay open, he promised himself he wouldn't give in. He would walk away with dignity. The bad guy was dead... he wasn't supposed to come away dead himself. He fell to his knees and clenched the gash with white gloves stained red. He looked straight ahead, mouth agape. The world had gone silent and time had begun to slow down. Just in front of him he saw someone reaching towards him. Their face was surprised and scared in a way that made him sick to his stomach.

What was happening? He couldn't feel himself breathing. Everything was turning into darkness. Confused, he tried to look around. He could have swore it was the middle of the day just a moment ago. And then it hit him.

Was he dying? Was this... the end?

"Where am I?" He shouted quickly. His expression was one of pure terror. He could hear others talking, but what they were saying was mashed together. So he screamed out once again.

"Where am I?!" Louder this time. There was silence for a moment, then hushed and loving tones in his ear. Why couldn't he move? Where was this voice coming from? Why couldn't he see them? Amid all the jumble someone asked him if he knew his name, but he couldn't remember how to use his voice anymore. He had just a moment ago. Then there was another voice. This one was strong and angry, telling someone to hold pressure. Hold pressure on what? His mind was foggy. Why couldn't he remember?

In the back of his mind, he knew who he was. He knew who had been talking to him. But, then there came silence. Darkness and silence and terror. Where was he? What was happening?

* * *

"Edward? Edward? Can you hear me. Come on, don't give up on me." Roy checked for a pulse once again. It was there but erratic.

"Some one help me!" He screamed to the teammates rushing towards him. It wasn't a controlled yell, it was the type that let others know you were truly scared. The type that came from instinct.

"WHERE AM I?!" Edward screamed suddenly. Everyone stopped, startled. But it wasn't a moment later that everyone had picked up the pace again. There was no time for error or delay. He was on the verge of dying. Roy checked his pulse again and found that it was not very strong and weaker by the second.

Quickly, he stripped off his jacket and placed his hands on Edwards sternum. His pressed down with enough force to kill, but this was supposed to do the exact opposite. He counted each push until he got to thirty and then leant over to blow air into his lungs.

"Put pressure on his side quickly! We need to get to a clinic, go!" That was all he said before he went back to palpitating Edward's lungs. The group wasted no time moving him to the car.

"What happened, sir?!" Riza shouted above the rest.

"We were ambushed."

Havoc wished the car could go faster. Even thinking that Edward could die was too much. He would never be able to go on the same person if something did happen to him. He doubted Roy would ever be sane again.

"Havoc, please!" Roy begged. Havoc nodded and put the peddle to the floor.

This was supposed to be a routine maintenance checkup of the grounds and warehouses. They were supposed to make sure nothing was in disrepair or the lights weren't left on. Silly things like that. How did this happen?

Roy realized he hadn't gotten a good look at Edward's attacker, but there was no need to worry. He would still be laying right there when they got back. Edward had taken a massive blow, but he made sure to completely take down his offender. Roy was proud of that.

Soon, they whipped into the long narrow road that led to the hospital. They burst out of the car and escorted Roy quickly as he carried Edward's small body in his arms. The doors slammed open as they entered.

"Please, I need a doctor." Roy urged a nurse from behind the counter. She hurried away and came back with help. A large man plucked Edward from his arms and carried him to places unknown. And they all sat.

* * *

Edward woke. He looked to window revealing that it was night. He wondered where he was. Finding that it was much too painful to sit, he leant back on his pillow and tried to relax. Machines. White walls. Body trivia. He was in the hospital. He sighed loudly and thought about what had happened. Maybe if he had only listened to Roy…..

He recalled the memory very clearly. He had been goofing off, he ran ahead of the others. They were within seeing distance. Roy had just called out to him to come back, that he was too far away…. then his lecture ended with him muttering about the safety in numbers and that sticking together was the best course of action. Edward had turned back to his colleagues to pop off and had felt the sting of thick, slicing metal pierce his skin.

He shook his head in disappointment at himself. That mistake could have ended his life. There was a small lamp in the corner revealing most of the room. Scanning it slowly, he noticed someone snoozing in the chair to his left. He let out a sigh of relief. It was just Roy.

"Roy?" His small voice surprised even himself as Roy was startled awake.

"Wha-? What?" He looked up to Edward and smiled. Finally, after two days of lifelessness, he was here again.

"How long have you been here?" Edward's voice revealed that he was exhausted even after having been out for the last couple of days.

"It doesn't matter how long I've been here. I'm just glad that you're awake. Are you feeling alright? Do you need a nurse? Are you hungry?" Edward just shook his head and chuckled.

"No, no I'm fine." Edward leveled his head on his pillow and locked eyes with Roy.

"You almost got yourself killed, Edward." Roy just shook his head and looked at the ground.

"Your loss would have been a major blow to the team."

Edward only looked at Roy as if he had been scolded. Roy had never talked to him that way. Never…. The silence set in… It was time for a joke.

"So, you meant to say that you care about my life?" Edward's smile curled as he watched Roy's expression become sly and despicable once again.

"What do you mean? You little punk. I should have you discharged for insubordination."

Their quiet banter stopped and Edward looked softly at Roy.

"Who… found me?" Edward was dying to know who had spared him when he could have been left that way. Right now, all he is to the military was dead weight and a hospital bill.

"Well, I heard you yell and I was nearby so I ran over and you were on your knees… just staring into space."

Yes, Roy could remember it well.

* * *

 _Edward just looking to the sky, that surprisingly dumbfounded look on his face. There was so much blood. It swiftly trickled down his side and ran out into a puddle on the cold cement. The sickly smell of iron in the air; not only from Edward, but the assassin as well._

 _Edward's voice rang out into the dimness of the evening. Terrified and frantic he fell to the ground writhing and gritting his teeth. For Roy it was a heart stopping moment. Time slowed and his heart kicked at the site in front of him. His body reacted to the moment, his mind not fully processing anything. Fearful of death. Fearful of loss. Fearful of being broken._

 _And he cried out to the others._

* * *

"Edward, I think you need some time off." Roy said seriously as he clasp his hands together.

"Excuse me?" Edward was suddenly very lucid.

"It's an order, not a request. You could have gotten killed. You could have died, Edward! If we hadn't have acted so quickly you'd be in hole in the ground." Roy rubbed his forehead expressing true agitation.

"You don't care. I'm nothing, but a disappointment on your record anyway." Edward snarkily replied. His nose pointedly turn away from Roy. Arms crossed. He had played this game with Roy many times.

 _You will… I will… You won't… I will defy you… See what happens…_

Every time is was the same. They argued, Edward proved his point, and Roy lost his temper.

"My record!? Are you insane?!" Roy leapt from his seat in the moment. His palms splayed out to his sides, willing himself to knock some sense into that brat. Edward looked up to him genuinely in shock.

"This isn't about my record. This is about your life! It has been about your life since day one. For the prodigy of our time, you're an idiot! What do I have to do, Edward? Do I have to get down on my hands and knees and beg you to be more careful!? Do I have to follow you around at arms length? What can I do to show you that your life is valuable!? You have meaning, Edward. I don't give a shit if you believe there is a God or not. You were put here to help this generation. Don't you dare fucking waste it. Can't you see that others care for you… that I care for you? Doesn't that mean anything to you?" Roy turned away.

He felt empty. So many nights he had stayed awake rereading handwritten letters from Edward. So many days he had worried that Edward was dead somewhere. Going months at a time without seeing him or getting word on how he was doing was gut wrenching. At first, it was worry because he didn't want to lose his best play in the game… but now… It was because he had grown fondness and familiarity for him. Handing him everything he needed. Wanted. Wished for. Edward was spoiled by him so much that other employees took notice. They scorned and laughed at Roy behind his back, calling him 'babysitter' and 'cradle robber'.

He scowled to himself. He had taken so much shit off of Edward that it was happening when Edward wasn't even in the same country.

"Well… I didn't know you felt so strongly about this." Edward replied, lying through his teeth.

He had known for a long time that Roy catered to his every need. Edward never wanted for anything in Roy's presence. He was taking Roy and his feelings for granted. He knew that he tried his best to cover up Edward's tracks. Give him every detail he wanted. Point him in the direction he was aiming for. Resources, research, room and board, exotic food, the list was endless. There wasn't a thing on this Earth that Roy wouldn't do to make Edward happy. All Roy ever asked for was to check in with him, but Edward refused saying that he didn't want Roy keeping tabs on him. He felt ridiculous. It was a childish thing to do to someone.

"I'm sorry." Edward said genuinely. Roy sat back down, telling Edward not to apologize.

"No, it's not fair to you. You do so much and I've tossed it in your face more than a few times. I don't deserve you. I promise to make things easier for you from now on." Edward said as he tried to lift himself up. He hissed at the pain coming from his side. It was bad.

"Let me help you." Roy took ahold of Edward's back and hand, guiding him to a sitting position.

"Your wounds were…. They were terrible, Ed. We thought for sure you weren't coming back from this one." Roy said carefully.

"Who sent the assassin?" Edward asked as he peeked at his gash. It was crusted and mangled from the stitches. Extending from his groin all the way to his ribcage. That asshole had literally gutted him.

"We believe it was an isolated attempt. He wasn't working for anyone that we know of. He didn't belong to any gangs in town. In fact, we have no idea who he is, but he's dead. We think he might have just wanted to take a stab at the military personnel. No pun intended. Unfortunately for him, he picked the wrong guy. They sent out reports to town to see if anyone can come forward with information or identify his body. No luck yet, though. " Roy answered. The man didn't have a tattoo, a birthmark, or anything to set him apart from other civilians. Average height, medium build, brown hair, brown eyes. He wasn't even carrying a wallet. No criminal record. No missing persons report. No medical records found because they didn't know who he was. It was like this guy just blended in with his surroundings.

"Maybe something will turn up. What did he cut me with?" Edward asked looking to Roy. He was a little disturbed by the velocity of his laceration. It had to be something ridiculously sharp, long, and jagged.

"You're never going to believe this, but it was a hack saw. We believe he swung it into your side and pulled backwards." Roy gulped feeling his throat sting. He felt like throwing up.

"He sawed me? Are you joking?" Edward peered down to his side and back to Roy.

"No. But for the life of us we don't know where he got it. It was medical grade. We've checked every surrounding clinic, pharmacy, and medical supply office for miles. He didn't work at any of them." Roy answered feeling frustrated. His men had been on it for days and every leading clue came up empty.

"I hate to change the subject, but I am starting to feel a little hungry and I'm parched." Edward said grasping his stomach. He felt like he was starving.

"Yes. I'll go get someone." Roy said a little frantically. It had been almost three days since Edward had eaten.

"Ok." Edward replied propping himself on a pillow.

"Be right back." Roy concluded as he walked out of the room.

Soon the entire hospital room was full of staff. They brought him food, water, extra pillows, checked his wounds, checked his vitals, and told him that if he needed anything to just ask. No request was too big after a life threatening injury. They were absolutely gracious to him.

"Thank you." Edward and Roy rang out as they exited the doorway.

"No thank you necessary. We just want you to be comfortable." One nurse said sweetly as she closed the door behind her.

"Wow. That was really nice of them." Edward said quietly as he plowed into his dinner.

"She was right. We just want you to feel better." Roy agreed as he sat down beside Edward and watched him carefully. Ed didn't miss it. He knew that look.

"If you have something to say…" Edward trailed off nonchalantly as he took a bite of his food. Roy looked to the door, then back to Edward.

"I'm scared." Roy said flatly.

"Of what?" Edward answered putting his utensil on his plate. Roy Mustang wasn't afraid of anything.

"Loving you." Roy answered, swallowing and rubbing his face.

They locked eyes. Edward's mouth fell open and then shut. He looked to the floor.

"Are you confessing to me?" Edward didn't know what to say. His heart was beating so fast he was fearful it might explode.

"Yes."


	2. Chapter 2

**This starts out as a flashback. I didn't want anyone getting confused.**

* * *

"Well, we'll just have to wait for his return. He's sent word. He's on his way." Roy said carelessly. He lounged in his chair overlooking the grounds of Central Base.

"Sir." Riza barked as she looked out with him.

"Yes?" Roy didn't take his eyes off the window as he sipped a flask of whiskey.

"If I may. Your manner would suggest that you are becoming attached." Riza looked to her superior. She knew what was going on. She had seen the drunken episodes, the rants, the endless time wasted staring at his letters.

"You're too bold, Officer." Roy turned towards his desk as he motioned for Riza to sit on one of his couches.

"Am I? Once feared and now taunted. Is that the way a commanding officer should display himself?" She sighed and sat down, placing one knee over the other.

"I assure you, Hawkeye, my duty and loyalty lies with the mission. I am merely playing my best pawn. If he doesn't feel properly entertained, he'll go rogue and I'll be back at square one." His calm demeanor did nothing for her suspicions. She wasn't one to be toyed with. His facade was impeccable, but when you were with someone for years, you knew when they were lying.

"General Mustang, I hardly doubt he'd go rogue after all this time... I knew it." She stated as she mockingly smirked at him. His cheeks flushed as he cleared his throat.

"What are you implying?"

"I'm not implying. I'm certain that you… love him." Riza took hold of a glass of wine and lifted it to her awaiting lips.

"Preposterous. You've lost your mind." He rolled his eyes and looked to his stack of signed documents.

"Have I? Roy… you've lost yours. You could get discharged if anyone found out..." She trailed off as she took a sip of her spirits.

"I don't have a relationship with that… that child! And the fact that you come to me with accusations of such bullshit... Do you hear yourself?" Roy asked as he finished off his drink and slammed it down on his desk.

"He is not a child any longer, Mustang. He has been through war and survived. FullMetal's time is almost up. In just a few short weeks, he'll be a free man. What are you 'playing' at this point? He's going to get away from Amestris as fast he can." Riza looked away sadly. She felt the sting of rejection many times from the man sitting right in front of her. He didn't love her. She had moved on long ago, but she still wanted to see him happy.

"I know he will. But Riza… he's not interested." Roy sighed and propped his head on his fist.

"How do you know if you've never asked?" She stated standing. She had never taken Roy Mustang for a coward.

"How do you know that birds love flying?" Roy escalated his voice to match her tone.

"He's not a bird!" She growled back. The two of them startled back to reality as they heard a small knock on the door. They both straightened themselves and Riza sat back down.

"Come in." The General said powerfully.

"If this is a bad time, I can come back later." Edward appeared in the door. His coat slung over his shoulder as he inquired on their argument.

"No, no. It's fine. Come in." Roy fidgeted in his seat, rearranging some books on his desk.

"I was just leaving. It's good to see you again, FullMetal." Riza smiled to him as she turned back to Roy.

"Good to see you, too." Ed perched himself across from her and slung his arms above his head.

"General. I'll be at my post." Riza wandered away, closing the door behind her.

"What was that all about?" Edward asked looking confused. He had never heard Riza and Roy argue so passionately.

"Nothing. On with your report. I hope you've actually put some effort into it this time." Roy stated looking down to his young comrade.

"Yeah, yeah. It's all there." Edward let down his hair and began to rebraid it.

"What are you doing?" Roy asked as he eyed the young man.

"What? Me?" Edward looked behind him and then back to Roy confused. He played with the ends of his hair.

"Yes, you. Are you braiding your hair?" Roy asked sheepishly. He suddenly smelt the alcohol on his own breath.

"Are you drunk?" Edward asked cautiously.

"No… uh FullMetal… Why don't you just return to your quarters? I'll meet with you tomorrow. You've been traveling a lot today." Roy was trying his damndest to get Edward away before he slipped up and spilled his guts. He wanted to tell Edward everything. He had such little time before Edward's contract was over and he felt the minutes ticking away. But right now wasn't the time.

"Whatever. See you tomorrow, Mustang." Edward leapt from his seat, eager to leave.

"Wait." Roy said a little too excitedly. Edward turned back to him from the door.

"... Your jacket." Roy pushed his feelings down and pointed towards the leather coat hanging off his couch.

"Oh, thanks." Edward grabbed it and looked at it for a moment, but whatever he was thinking he decided against as he slowly closed the door behind him.

Roy sighed and loosened his tie. He easily could have given himself away. What was he thinking….? His inner dialogue berated him as he thought of the scenario that had just unfolded in front of him.

* * *

Edward kicked off his boots as he entered his, oh so familiar, Amestrian apartment. He had spent many, many nights here debating equations and discussing politics with Alphonse. He flipped on the lights and threw himself onto the bed.

"Finally, some peace and quiet." He reached for a stack of books at his side. With all the commotion of the war, defeating Father, and seeing Al off to their hometown, he hadn't had much time to just relax.

He dove into the literature, losing himself in a romance novel he had put off for far too long. There were sword fights and damsels in distress. There were good guys vanquishing evil in the name of love. He came to the end as main character and his love interest kissed for the very first time.

Edward realised it had been hours after he had gotten home and much to his displeasure his stomach was growling. He went to the kitchen and checked the fridge. There wasn't much to speak of. He had been away for a long time. He sighed and stepped away from the kitchen. He was about to shower himself when he heard a knock on the door.

"Who in the world?" Edward strode to the door a little irritated. Of course, someone would come to disturb him the one night he had free.

"Hello?" He spoke softly as he opened his entryway to Roy.

"Uh… Hello. I just wanted to bring you this." Roy said a little flustered as he held out a few packages to Edward. His face was hot and his throat burned. He had a lot of liquid courage coursing through him. If he hadn't, he would have never went through with this.

"Mustang? What are you doing?" Edward asked as he let his superior in. He closed the door behind him and followed Roy to his small living room. He could smell the alcohol as he trailed behind him.

"I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday." Roy said as he made himself at home on Edward's couch.

"My birthday? How did you…?" It dawned on Edward that it was, in fact, his brithday.

"Yeah. I brought you cake and wine and a gift." Roy said as he put all the packages on the coffee table in front of him. Edward smiled at the gifts.

"Why?" Edward looked around. For a moment he was convinced that it was all a prank.

"I just thought you would like someone to celebrate with." Roy said sheepishly as he took off his coat.

"Ok." Edward settled down on the floor and open the first package. It was a small cake with 'Happy Birthday' written across the top. He looked up to Roy puzzled.

"Thank you." Edward spoke softly as he open the next one. A bottle of red wine. And the last one he opened was a solid gold wrist watch. He took it out and held it carefully.

"Do you like it? I hope it fits." Roy said thinking back to when he bought it. He had hoped that it wouldn't fall off Edward's small wrist. He had to have some of the links removed.

"I do, but you shouldn't have. This looks really expensive." Edward examined the watch carefully. He wanted to reject the gift, but the look on Roy's face as he pushed it in Roy's direction made him change his mind. He sighed and smiled.

"Help me put it on, please." Edward didn't want to disappoint him after he had went to so much trouble. Roy gently took his hand and placed the watch on his wrist, clasping it.

"Happy Birthday, Edward." Roy laughed as he popped open the bottle of wine. Edward looked down to his watch and smiled. It had been a very long time since he had celebrated his birthday. The last time he had truly celebrated was when his mother was still alive.

"Thank you. I really appreciate it." Edward said taking a glass and clinking it to Roy's.

"I wanted to do something special for you. You have truly proven yourself over all these years. I don't know where we would have been without you." Roy said, carefully lifting his glass to his lips.

"How old am I?" Edward asked feeling silly. He honestly couldn't remember. So much time was devoted to his cause that he had lost count.

"I believe you're nineteen." Roy tried to do the math in his head, but it was becoming muddled among other thoughts. He was thinking of the way Edward laughed, his smile, his personality.

"Nineteen. Wow. I missed all of those birthdays." Edward sighed looking down. He realized that they had skipped over Alphonse's birthdays as well. They truly had their childhood stolen from them.

"Well, it doesn't have to be that way ever again." Roy didn't really know what he was saying at this point. He was coming in and out of his own mental conversation, as well as keeping up with Edward's.

"Are you excited about your contract coming up?" Roy asked pleasantly. He scooted over as Edward sat down beside him.

"Yeah, I hadn't thought about it much. I can't wait to go see Al and my aunt back in Resembool." Edward said as he crossed his legs and turned towards Roy.

"That's good." Roy bit down the ebbing feeling of loneliness. He didn't want to see Edward go.

"I know. All my old friends are probably married and have kids by now. So much has happened while we were away. I'll be glad to get back and catch up with everyone." Edward thought back to his childhood. Nostalgic memories flooded his mind. He realised Roy had gone silent.

Roy was dozing off. Edward gently leant over him taking the glass from his hands and sat it down on the table. He didn't want to be rude and ask Roy to leave, so put away the cake and wine in the fridge and settled back down on the couch to read. It wasn't long after that he fell asleep himself. The book, once splayed across his lap, gently fell to the floor.

* * *

Roy woke, not entirely sure of where he was. He looked around and yawned about to stretch when he felt someone next to him. He looked down to see Edward under his arm, leaning on his side. For a moment his heart stopped. Edward Elric was cuddled up to him, Roy Mustang.

He didn't know what to do so he just sat there silently. He leant his head back and prayed he could go back to sleep before Edward woke up. Just a little longer, he thought to himself. He would never get this chance again. Still buzzed, it wasn't too hard for him to fall back to his dreams.

Edward nuzzled into the fabric. It smelt so good and he was so warm. Half asleep, and unknowingly, he put his arm over Roy's lap, scooting closer. He didn't remember the last time he felt this. Reality started closing in on him as he heard a soft thumping noise. He realised it was a heartbeat. He opened his eyes slowly. Roy's thick blue uniform stared back at him. Gasping, Edward looked up to see the General snoring. Edward sat up slowly as Roy instinctively pulled him back in.

He placed his hand on Roy's chest, a little surprised at how strong he was. For a moment, it didn't feel wrong. It felt nice. But if Roy found him like this, he didn't know what he would do. He decided to wake him up. He recoiled his hand from Roy's chest and placed it on Roy's knee, giving it a gentle shake.

"Uh… Mustang… Roy? Wake up." He whispered softly. Roy's arm gripped tighter as his eyes cracked open. He looked around and down to Edward looking uncomfortably embarrassed.

"Oh… I'm sorry." Roy stammered, immediately letting go of his young crush. Roy blanched as he felt his cheeks blushing.

"It's fine." Edward laughed, trying to lighten the atmosphere. They sat side by side for a few minutes, mulling over where to go from here.

Both apologised as they tried to speak at once.

"You go first." Said Edward.

"Would you... like to get some breakfast?" Roy asked hesitantly. Edward's stomach answered for him.

"I'll grab my coat." Edward answered grabbing his boots.

* * *

"Are you confessing to me?" Edward didn't know what to say. His heart was beating so fast he was afraid it might explode.

"Yes." Roy stated. They locked eyes cautiously.

"Well… I was wondering when you would say something." Edward remarked smiling. Roy had been laying down some, less than subtle, hints. He sat quietly as Edward took another bite of his food.

"After I get out of the hospital, would you like to date? I mean, it would be nice." Edward grinned to himself. This was the first time he had ever been asked out. Most people had mistaken him for a kid.

"I would like that." Roy regained his composure as the pair sat in silence. There was a lot to think about. Dating aside, neither one of them knew how to approach one another without feeling awkward.

"I'm warning you, though. I'm a jealous person." Edward said seriously.

"As am I." Roy agreed.

"If we're going to date, I would really like to be the only person." Edward stated boldly.

"Already taken care of." Roy cleared his throat as he replied and smiled at Edward

"Good." Edward went back to eating. It was equivalent exchanged after all. If he put everything he had into this relationship, he wanted Roy to do the same.


	3. Chapter 3

**Another Flashback. Sorry. I'm just really into showing their awareness of one another as they come to realize they have feelings for each other.**

* * *

Christmas eve. One of the few days a year that people offered their hands and hearts in fellowship. It was a merry scene. Lights illuminated the streets. Trees stood decorate with glass ornaments and garland. Some were even strung with popcorn. Many wonderful smells wafted out into the streets from homes as they prepared feasts for family gatherings.

Edward kicked the snow, turned to slush, as he walked through the empty streets. His breath was thick as he sighed. He stopped to watch a family through an open window curtain. Their laughter spilled through the walls as they told stories of good things to come. The strong winter wind cut through his coat like a knife. His hands froze through warm wool mittens. It was the coldest winter he felt he had ever experienced. Then again, he had never been so alone, and he wondered if it felt more icey because there was no one beside him as he pressed forward.

He gawked as sappy music drifted through the streets. There was nothing for him this holiday. He assured his family in Resembool that he wanted to be alone, it was just another day to him… right? Whether or not he had changed his mind, it was too late now. There were no trains going out or coming into Central for two more days. He stopped to pondered why he always felt compelled to put himself in personal anguish. Was it because he felt like he didn't deserve happiness or was it because he was a recluse? Not wanting to think those thoughts any longer he realised he was at Central Base. He sighed in relief. There was nothing like mind numbing work to keep him occupied.

He could almost hear Alphonse's voice full of sadness as Ed relayed to him that he didn't want to celebrate any holiday revolving around a deity that he didn't believe in. His brother had shakily answered that it was his decision and that he wouldn't press forward on the subject. He was sure that Al had hung up the phone and, at the same time, hung his head to sob gently. It had been over a year since Edward had visited. Every holiday was an opportunity for him to invite his older brother to their home and every wish was in vain. It stung Edward to heart the smallest fraction. Not because he was missing the holiday, but because he was missing his family.

He sat down in his squalid little cubicle. Every noise he made rang back to him in an echo. He was alone in that great big office. He buried himself in his work. Forcing himself to forget how sad and small he truly felt. He stamped and signed and sealed report after report until he came to the last sheet of paper. It was a letter from a higher up, he could tell by the wax seal holding the letter closed. He opened it quickly, if it was anything important, it probably wasn't good. He thought to himself about the last time he had gotten one of these. It was a handwritten letter from his superior officer telling him how he had majorly screwed up in filing something with the wrong department. He had even been laid off of work for two days because of that accident.

Of course, no one had noticed. He was the 'get there early, go home late, and eat lunch at your desk' kind of guy. He didn't even know one person on this floor. He realised that he hadn't spoken to anyone here in almost a month.

He sighed and opened the letter carefully, trying not to rip the dense paper underneath the envelope.

" _Dear Mr. Elric,_

 _It has come to my attention that you are without family in Central. We humbly invite you to our Holiday gathering. It's at 9 pm sharp on the third floor, Christmas Eve. Please join us as we celebrate together._

 _General Roy Mustang."_

Edward scanned the letter and looked to the clock. It was 8:25. He abruptly wadded the paper in both hands and angrily threw it in his trash bin. He locked his eyes on the cream colored ball, as they stung with greedy tears. He thought to himself, why spend this day with people he didn't know, or like, when he didn't even want to be with his own family. He didn't need someone else's sympathy. He had his own self doubt and pride to deal with.

But still…

He reached for the letter again, slowly grasping the crinkled page in his fingers. His tears stained the surface as he read it again, the ink smearing as he wiped his face. He wondered what it would be like to be surrounded by happy faces and cheerful conversation. He placed the letter in his lap and listened to the gears in his leg click and hum.

"Knock, knock."

Edward looked up through his small door to see a pair of cold, dark eyes staring back at him.

"I thought I'd find you here." Roy's eyes were clinical and guarded. He smirked as Edward scowled at the letter and did his best to hide it.

"So… are you coming?" Roy asked as he leant against the frame of the entryway.

"It's not like I have anything better to do, but I… I won't know anyone." Edward said as he shoved the paper into his desk and stood to grab another stack of waiting paperwork.

"That can wait and you know me." Roy said taking Edward's arm.

"That's not something to be proud about, Mustang." He retorted as he shook off Roy's arm and sat down at his desk.

"Well, we'll have food and booze." Roy stated as he looked away. Edward perked up. He was getting hungry.

"Ok, but I'm not going for you. I'm going to get drunk." Edward lifted himself from his desk and quickly sat back down as his automail leg made a resounding pop. He grit his teeth together as he realised he had blown a fuse running directly to the connectors on his nervous system port.

"What happened?" Roy asked suddenly kneeling at Edward's side.

"It's fine. I just need to get to my apartment. Winry taught me how to fix it." He tried to push Roy away as he went the long way around his desk. Grasping the edge for stability, but also to keep himself from making painstaking noise.

"I'm fine. I've just blown a fuse is all." He tried to straighten himself proudly as he took one shaky step forward and fell to the ground. Roy grasp his hand before he hit the floor.

"We have plenty of time to get your apartment and back to the party." Roy said as he threw Edward's arm over his shoulder and reached to grasp Edward's ribcage.

"Alright. Just don't think that I couldn't make it there without you." Edward's proud tongue lashed out. He hated being pitied and this was obviously pity.

They made their slow descent out of the building and the bitter cold raged in their face as they pressed on towards Edward's place. It was a short walk to the large standard military issue building. Edward sighed as he looked to the long staircase leading to his door. Three flights. He shook his head as they began to climb them. The searing hot pain in his leg was almost unbearable. They had only made it halfway up the first set of steps when Edward stopped.

Without a word, Roy pulled him into his large broad arms. Edward struggled in his grip for a moment before he accepted that this was the only way to get there as quickly, and the least painfully, as possible. Roy continued to hold him in his arms as he unlocked the door and stepped inside. It was delightfully warm. He sat Edward down on the couch carefully before having a good look around.

"Thank you." Edward said a little miserably.

"Don't mention it." Roy said as they went to work replacing the fuse.

Edward gripped down as he reattached the connector, but he couldn't hold back an ear deafening cry as the automail leg came to life. He let his head fall backwards as the lightning bolt of torture subsided to a dull ache. He slowly moved his leg and foot, testing it to make sure that he had done everything correctly. He only had to do that one other time, so the possibility of screwing up was rather high.

"Feel better?" Roy asked looking worried from where he sat beside Edward. He rarely ever saw anyone with automail, much less watch them work on one. He wondered briefly if it was a private moment, but from the way Edward peered at him made him forget that thought.

"What? Never seen anyone do that before?" Edward rolled his eyes and looked away. Of course it was frightening. He could especially scare someone with his port; wires hanging, and an open ended stump. He chuckled to himself, as he had many times someone had looked on to him with a mixture of sorrow, disgust, and curiosity.

"No." Roy answered a little more quiet than he was used to.

"Ahn. I feel much better now." Edward said standing to his feet. He jumped from one side to the other.

"It just blows me away that I can abuse this leg like crazy, but I turn around to get up out of a seat and it buckles. Ridiculous." Edward laughed as he put his pants back on and zipped them up.

"I'm just surprised and glad you were able to fix it so easily. It would have been a real bummer to wait two days for a shop to open up." Roy said as he stood himself.

"Ha, I would have just taken off the whole leg and made you drag me around." Edward said teasingly.

"I would have, but I would have laughed at you the whole time. Stumpy." Roy laughed as Edward fumed.

"Yeah, yeah." He picked up his coat and threw it on, turning out the lights as they walked out into the blistering blizzard once again.

They lightly quarrelled and talked on their way back. Edward struggled to keep up the pace as the snow deepened under their feet. Roy instinctively slowed as he noticed that the snow was coming up to Edward's knees.

"We're late." Edward said peering at his watch.

"They'll survive." Roy muttered as he opened the door to the party.

Everyone stopped their merry chattering and turned to them as they appeared in the doorway. Roy went straight to an empty couch as Edward mindlessly followed. His cheeks burned from the sudden attention. He flattened himself to his seat beside Roy, trying to make himself as invisible as possible.

"They're staring." Edward whispered to Roy as he glanced around the room.

Roy cleared his throat noisily and they quickly turned back to their drinks and conversation.

"What was that?" Edward asked as he looked up at Roy.

"Well… I'm sure that everyone expected me to bring a date and I'm sure they think you're it." Roy smirked as a server brought them drinks.

"Are you serious? I knew I shouldn't have come." Edward rubbed the bridge of his nose in embarrassment.

"Who cares what they think?" Roy said as he lifted the spiked eggnog to his lips.

"I do. Now a ton of people, I don't know, believe we're sleeping together. That's doesn't bother you at all?" Edward whispered a he looked around carefully. Roy sputtered on his drink and steadied himself.

"Ahn, It's Christmas, Ed. So they think that I'm sleeping with the great FullMetal Alchemist. Let them talk. After all, we know we're not together and that's what matters." Roy turned in his seat and motioned for Edward to come closer.

"Besides, it wouldn't kill you to act like you like me for one night." Roy whispered softly as Edward's paled. Roy eyed him like candy over his glass and Edward wondered if he was hitting on him.

"Roy Mustang. Wonderful to see you again." A beautiful woman made herself known to Edward's superior officer. She remarked in a way that made her sound, almost jealous.

"Alice." Roy nodded as he straightened himself and looked up to her.

"Nice to see you so… open." She retorted turning up her nose at Edward.

"Excuse me?" Edward glared at her intensely. She rolled her eyes and leant down to Roy so they were eye to eye.

"You're boyfriend looks feisty. Is that how you like them nowadays?" She chuckled leaning back up to look around before she evilly poured her drink in Edward's lap. He leapt to his feet trying to brush off the liquid before it stained his pants.

"Oops." She smiled and laughed as she walked away. Edward had enough. He turned to Roy who caught the young lady by her wrist.

"That was cheap of you, Ms. Smith. I think you owe him an apology." He let go of her and cleared his throat. Leaning in to make his voice as menacing as possible to her.

"You forget that this is my office and that this is my station. Pull another stunt like that and I'll have you escorted out. Have a nice evening, Ms. Smith." Roy pulled away and waved farewell as she drew back, wounded, and shuffled into the crowd. He turned to apologise to Edward, realising that he was making his way out. He quickly followed after him as Edward left.

"Edward." Roy called out. Edward turned to face him outside of the party in the hallway.

"I'm going home. I knew I never should have come here." He sighed and began to leave again before Roy grasp his hand.

"If you don't want to stay, then neither do I. Those people are high class assholes." Roy said as he realised that Edward was the only true friend he had inside that room.

"You belong with those people. You have a reputation to maintain. I'm not fancy, or eccentric, or flashy. Thank you for the invitation, but I think I'm through with celebrating." Edward plucked his hand from Roy's and smiled.

"Do you mind if I walk with you? I'm finished as well. This evening has left a sour taste in my mouth." Without an answer, Roy and Edward took off side by side.

"You don't have to do this. It's not like I wasn't invited home. I chose not to go." Edward shoved his hands in his pockets. They walked through the park lazily. What was once a blizzard was now a peaceful snowfall. Flakes of white powder drifted through the air and landed on the ground. Edward looked up to the sky and opened his mouth, letting a few fall on his tongue. Roy chuckled as he did the same. It had been a stretch of time since Roy had played in the snow.

"Hey Edward." Roy called out mischievously. Edward smirked as he realised Roy was holding a ball of snow. He threw it, hitting Edward in the chest.

"You wanna play old man, we'll play." He scooped up a fist full himself and was surprised as Roy threw another, grazing his cheek. Roy took off in a fit of laughter as Edward chased after him. He was right on his heels when Roy stopped and turned around, grabbing Edward and throwing him into a snowbank. Roy laid down beside him and plowed his hands and feet through the thick white, making a rather large snow angel.

"Don't forget to put horns on it. That's the only way it would suit you." Edward smiled as he propped himself up on his elbows. Roy smiled back as he devilishly complied and place two horns on top.

"Perfect." Roy stated chuckling. He watched Edward look up to the dark night sky and he did the same. You couldn't see many stars, the snow made sure to hide them, but you could see the bright blue moon hanging among them.

"It's gorgeous, isn't it?" Roy said pointedly looking at Edward. Edward's head snapped down to make sure he had heard Roy right. His large golden eyes seemed bigger as he swallowed and cleared his throat.

"Yes. Yes, it is." He agreed softly, not looking away.

* * *

Edward was rehabilitating well. He spent hours learning how to use his freshly sliced abs to sit up again. Every day, Roy visited him and helped any way he could. They hadn't spoken much about dating or being together, but everyday was an opportunity for Roy to get that much closer to Edward. Watching someone struggle through physical therapy was one of the most intimate things Roy had ever done.

"Today is the day." Roy settled into his claimed chair at Edward's bedside. He watched Edward hold his side and swing his legs over the edge, standing on his own. He was doing spectacular for only being in the hospital two weeks.

"Yeah." Edward knew that Roy's comment had two meanings. His time at the hospital was over, but his contract was also up. He still had another month to reinstate his title if he pleased.

"Edward, I could give you a job where you sat in my office all day. You don't have to leave." He gently took Edward's hand and lifted himself from his seat, guiding Edward to sit down in his place.

"I know." Edward said snapping. His pain tolerance was at its threshold. Roy knelt in front him and placed his hand on Edward's knee.

"I'll miss you." He was uncharacteristically showing his soft side. It was true. He would miss Edward dearly. His heart stung as Edward chuckled.

"Keep your pants on, Roy. I didn't say I was going anywhere, did I?" He placed his strong fingers on Roy's gloved hand. Roy's chest pounded as he mulled over what Edward said. They sat there, smiling like fools at one another. They were interrupted as a nurse let himself in to officially discharge Edward.

"Alright. Looks like you get to go home today, Mr. Elric." He quickly went over a few instructions on how to care for his wound and told him that if he had any problems to come back, that they would be more than happy to assist him at any time.

They wheeled him to the front and helped him get settled in to Mustang's awaiting car. Roy took him out to lunch. He had brought Edward an extra meal every day, knowing that his appetite far surpassed the three meals he received at the hospital. His efforts felt almost wasted as Edward looked like he had lost a good chunk of weight and muscle.

They laughed over past stories of bickering and squabbles between them. They were equally matched when it came to wit and it was easy for them to bump heads over the most miniscule of subjects. There were many times they had both came away from an argument fuming, knowing that the other was right, but too proud to admit they were wrong. There were many similarities about the duo that neither one of them felt comfortable enough to express. It was hard to apologise when you felt a personal vendetta floating about both sides of the spectrum.

A lot had changed in the last few years. Their hotheaded arguments had subsided to meaningful conversation. Edward became independent in his work and Roy had kept to the shadows, watching Edward from afar. He would often stay late to make sure no one bothered the young man and see him off. Even if his affection and attention towards Edward had been one sided, he didn't mind. He knew that Edward was perfectly capable of taking care of himself, but when you fall for someone your judgement gets cloudy.

"Roy…" Edward stared at his food, it went untouched. Roy was lost in thought as Edward's voice sucked him back to reality.

"Do you think that this will work?" Edward said quietly. Roy dabbed at his mouth with a cloth napkin and sighed. He had many questions himself.

"I wouldn't have tried if I didn't think we could get along." Roy stated, trying to steer the conversation to a safe place.

"I'm sure we could get along pretty well. You know that's not what I'm asking." Edward clasp his hands together in his lap as he waited for Roy's answer.

"I will do everything in my power to protect and uphold our relationship. I never said it was going to be easy, but nothing I have ever wanted has come to me without a struggle." Roy's words were torturously slow. He wasn't being vindictive, just trying to figure out what he was saying as he said it. It was true. Nothing had ever been cut and dry for Edward either. He knew where Roy was coming from.

"I understand. You have been by my side all this time. You've already, more than enough, proven to me that you aren't going anywhere. I just want to be committed to someone, wholly. I want and feel the same things you do." Edward wasn't guarded. He stuttered through his sentences trying hard to show Roy that he did care.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is that, I have feelings for you too and I don't want to push them away anymore." Edward blushed deeply as those words left his mouth. Roy beamed in his seat as he listened to Edward carefully.

"I'm glad." Roy said steadily. They both went to their food, silently enjoying each other's gaze.

* * *

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